Try Have Sex With My Wife – Just For Laugh

• Author: Ylva Ng
• Filed under: Humour
• Date: Nov 4,2009

SICK LEAVE
Bangladesh Worker: “Sir, me no come to work, me sick.”
Boss: “When I am sick, I have sex with my wife – try it.”
2 hours later, Bangladesh Worker: “Boss! It worked! Me ok now .You got nice house.”
USED TO HAVE
After sex, Thai girl kept fondling man’s c**k.
Man asked: “Why? Want to have sex again.”
Thai Girl replied: “No lah, just admiring your c**k. I used to have one before.”

CLOTHES
Women’s lives are hard.
Morning wash clothes.
Noon hang clothes.
Evening keep clothes.
Nite iron clothes.
Midnight take off clothes.
Few hours after midnight find clothes.

LAWYER & MATHS
A lawyer who was confused in his mathematics asked his secretary: “If I give you $3million less 17.5%, how much would you take off?”
Secretary: “Everything sir! Dress, Bra and Panties.”

LIGHTEST THING
Scientists have discovered that the lightest thing in the world is a PENIS.
This is because it can be lifted up even by a simple thought. 

PREGNANT WIFE
Since the wife is eight months into her pregnancy, the husband has to sleep on the floor to avoid any regrettable mistake, which might happen pretty easily, for he has been desperate for quite a while now…

Just before lying down on the bed, she glances at him and sees the poor guy curled up on the floor, eyes staring widely into the empty air, filled with hopeless desire…

Feeling sorry for her husband, she opens the top drawer of the cabinet, takes out a fifty dollar bill, and gives it to him, “Awww, my honey is so depressed… Here, take this and go to the woman next door, she will let you sleep with her tonight… And remember that this happens only once…Ok?…Don’t think about it again.”

The husband rolls his eyes in disbelief, but afraid that she may change her mind, he grabs the money and leaves quickly. A few minutes later, he returns, hands the bill back to the wife and says with much disappointment, “She said this is not enough, she wants sixty.”

The wife’s face slowly turns red with anger, “Damn that bitch… When she was pregnant and her husband came over here… I only charged him fifty.”